It is very difficult to write this but at the moment my life is pretty much in a state of flux as I cope with the very sudden loss of my lovely husband in April. Life will never be the same again I know but I am still taking very small steps to decide which way to go from here.
The year has been punctuated by all the "first days" without him--birthdays, 53rd wedding anniversary and now Christmas is nearly here. In a way you are ready for those things but it is the unexpected moments that catch you out like spotting the red squirrel, the nuthatch, a beautiful sunset and turning to point them out to him and he isn't there.
People talk of stages of grief but it doesn't prepare you and everyone copes in their own way. Looking back over eight months my totally overwhelming feeling is thankfulness. I am so very glad and grateful that we found and loved each other for all those years, for our family of children and grandchildren and the fun we had along the way.
I miss him so very much.
RIP my love.
1 comment:
ros, i only just came across this and send hugs and much love to you. What is it they say, "it doesnt get easier, it just gets different". Hope the warmth of your memories comforts you during these darkest days.
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